The Daily Valet. - 4/15/22, Friday

✔️ It’s Getting Hostile In Here

April 15, 2022

Friday, April 15th Edition

Cory Ohlendorf, Editor in Chief of Valet.

If you had Elon money, what’s a company you would buy?

Cory Ohlendorf , Editor ⋯ @coryohlendorf

Today’s edition is presented by

Today’s Big Story

Elon Musk’s Hostile Takeover

“I don’t care about the economics at all.”

Well, the week started with the announcement that Elon Musk wouldn't join Twitter’s board. And some wondered if that was a prelude to a hostile takeover. On Thursday, we found out as Musk made an offer to buy the company outright for roughly $43 billion, according to documents filed with the SEC. Musk said in the filing that if his offer isn’t accepted, he’ll likely sell all his shares.

As news of the bid spread throughout Twitter, employees expressed concern that their workplaces might suffer under the leadership of the incendiary tech mogul. Twitter CEO Parag Agrawal told employees Thursday that the company was still evaluating the offer for Musk to take it private—setting the stage for a potentially drawn-out feud with the world’s richest person.

Agrawal reassured his workforce of 7,500 full-time employees by arguing that one man could not change a culture and that it was up to the company to set strategy, according to staffers who spoke to the Washington Post. Agrawal’s remarks suggest Twitter won’t bend to Musk’s whims easily and that a messy, Succession-style corporate battle could soon play out.

So really, why does he want to buy it? Coincidentally, Musk was able to share his perspective on the future of the social network on during a live TED2022 event yesterday afternoon. In an onstage interview at the conference, Musk said he believes Twitter should follow the laws of the countries it operates in and otherwise not regulate users’ speech.

According to Gizmodo, Musk branded his buyout of Twitter around filling the need for an “inclusive arena of free speech” and expressed interest in open-sourcing the Twitter algorithm to reduce any behind-the-scenes manipulation. Musk also described his interest in shutting down “spam and scam bots,” as well as integrating an edit button to tweets.

He said he defined free speech as this: “Is someone you don’t like allowed to say something you don’t like? It’s damn annoying, but that is the sign of a healthy, functioning free speech situation.” He also said “This isn’t a way to make money ... I don’t care about the economics at all.”

↦ FYI: Esquire thinks up other ways one might spend $43 billion ... like franchising 88,802 Dominos.

Russian Warship Sinks

The largest military vessel to sink in decades

Russia's defense ministry said Thursday that the Moskva cruiser, the flagship of its Black Sea fleet, sank while being towed in a storm due to damage incurred in a fire.

The Russians had said a fire broke out on board and caused munitions to explode. But the Ukrainian military claimed they struck the 610-foot Soviet-era vessel with cruise missiles. If confirmed, the missile attack would be a serious blow to Russia, both militarily and symbolically—proof that this domineering country's ships can no longer operate with impunity, and another damaging blow to morale.

Meanwhile, a senior U.S. official may travel to Kyiv soon in a show of solidarity. President Biden told reporters the administration was “making that decision now.” This potential trip would follow recent visits to Ukraine by the British prime minister and the presidents of Poland, Latvia, Lithuania and Estonia.

However, Russia—in a formal diplomatic note to the United States—warned that U.S. and NATO shipments of the “most sensitive” weapons systems to Ukraine were “adding fuel” to the conflict and could bring “unpredictable consequences.”

↦ Protest: An artist in St. Petersburg replaced price tags at a supermarket with anti-war notes and now faces up to 10 years in prison.

Partner

Feeling rundown? You don't need more coffee, but you could very well be deficient in an element essential for a number of functions in the body.

Tax Day Is Monday

If you waited (like I did), we’ve got a weekend project to tackle

If you're one of those procrastinators who still hasn't filed your taxes, you're not alone. I'll be filing this weekend. And about one-third of Americans have waited until the very last minute.

A survey from IPX 1031 finds the most common reason this year for the delay is the belief that if there's no refund, there's no rush to file. Over 30% of people surveyed use that excuse, while 25% say filing is too stressful and another 20% say they want to make sure they're filing correctly.

Nevertheless, the IRS still expects you to file your 2021 return and pay whatever you still owe by the filing deadline, which is Monday, April 18. But on the bright side, the average tax refund is actually bigger than it was last year. According to CNBC, nearly 58 million tax refunds have already been issued and the average payment was $3,263—about $400 more than the average refund for the 2021 filing season.

Oh, and it's worth noting that the government wants to know about any cryptocurrency or NFT transactions you've made in the past year— if you made money on those deals, you're supposed to report it.

↦ Dig Deeper: ProPublica reveals the top U.S. income-earners and how their tax rates vary more than their incomes.

A Weekend Pairing

‘Choose or Die’ + a Blinker Cocktail

What did I tell you earlier this week? The '80s are back. And if you like your nostalgia with more than a little horror, or you're just a fan of a good adventure game, then be sure to check out Choose or Die, streaming now on Netflix. The film is essentially a twisted take on The Oregon Trail.

If you enjoyed Squid Game, you could get some kicks from this unsettling movie about a new kind of deadly game played on an old school computer. Hoping to cash in on the prize, Kayla and Isaac unwittingly play the cursed game that forces them to make terrifying decisions to survive. Horror genre fans will no doubt recognize references to the classics throughout the film (see if you can spot the Nightmare on Elm Street poster). There aren't any reviews out yet, but both Collider and Decider seem eager to check it out.

↦ Your Pairing:The Blinker, first printed in 1934, looks crazy on paper. So like the movie, as you make it, you’re wondering if you made a mistake. But somehow the citrus and rye are perfectly punctuated with a sweet shot of grenadine.

In Other News

↦ FDA Authorizes Breath Test That Can Detect COVID-19 in Three Minutes

↦ With Jack Dorsey Flop, Are NFTs Finally Crashing Down to Earth?

↦ When Did Coachella Peak?

Other Things We’re Talking About Today

The new grey Beats Studio Buds

The future of offices

Lizzo

Partner

Are You Low on Electrolytes?

If you’re active, or following a keto, low-carb, or paleo diet, you likely are

We hear about electrolytes a lot. But what are they exactly? These essential minerals—like sodium, calcium, magnesium and potassium—are vital to many key functions in the body. In fact, according to Cedars-Sinai clinical dietitian Erika Der Sarkissian, they're responsible for regulating muscle contractions and keep you hydrated, while also balancing your pH levels and controlling your nervous-system function.

Which is why we feel so cruddy when we're running low on them. Electrolyte deficiency or imbalances can cause headaches, cramps, fatigue and weakness. When you sweat, the primary electrolyte lost is sodium (and you can lose up to seven grams per day). When sodium isn't replaced, it's common to experience muscle cramps and fatigue. I know this from firsthand experience after my weekend bike rides (nearly 50 miles last Saturday, thank you very much). At first I worried it was age catching up on me when I experienced a woozy fatigue and couldn't get off the couch.

But now I realize I wasn't properly rehydrating to restore lost electrolytes. And the same can happen if you're following a low-carb, ketogenic diet as well (anyone hear of the “keto flu”?) LMNT is an easy and tasty way to get back vital electrolytes. The single-severing drink mix has everything you need and nothing you don't. That means a generous dose of salt, along with potassium and magnesium but absolutely no sugar.

Those sports drinks you find at the convenience store? Yeah the average bottle has a whopping 34 grams of sugar in them. And only 270 mg of sodium. LMNT, on the other hand, skips the sugar, artificial ingredients and colors. And they've got a science-backed electrolyte ratio of 1,000 mg sodium, 200 mg potassium and 60 mg magnesium. Plus, the fruit flavors are refreshing and sweetened only with natural, no-calorie stevia. Now I can see why it's used by everyone from pro athletes and Olympians to Navy Seals.

↦ Try It: Get 8 single serving packets free, just cover the cost of shipping ($5 for U.S. customers).

The New Shoes on Our Radar

Todd Snyder x L.L. Bean Textured Camp Shoe

↑ Todd Snyder has done it again with this L.L. Bean collab. These shoes were introduced back in 1936 by Leon Leonwood Bean (Mr. L.L. himself) and he compared the comfortability to a pair of authentic Indian moccasins. Fast forward 86 years and Todd Snyder has updated them ($349) with a contemporary sensibility and quality materials. A tonal, textural full-grain leather upper that molds to your foot after each wear and a traditional rubber sole with grooves for added traction makes for an amazingly adaptive shoe no matter where you are.

↦ Want more? 5 new shoes on our radar