The Daily Valet. - 4/14/23, Friday

✔️ That Didn't Take Long

Valet.
Valet.
The Daily Valet.
The Daily Valet.

Friday, April 14th Edition

Cory Ohlendorf

By Cory Ohlendorf, Valet. Editor

As old Ben Franklin famously said, “Nothing is certain but death and taxes.”

Today’s Big Story

Suspected Leaker Arrested

Was a 21-year-old National Guard airman looking to give gamers a real taste of war?

Leaker

That didn't take too long. Law enforcement officials have linked that trove of classified government documents leaked on Discord to a 21-year-old Air Force National Guard member. The suspect, Jack Teixeira, was arrested at his home in North Dighton, Massachusetts, on Thursday—an hour and a half after the New York Times identified him as the administrator of the online group, Thug Shaker Central, where a cache of leaked intelligence documents first appeared.FBI agents took Teixeira into custody “without incident,” Attorney General Merrick Garland announced in brief remarks at the Justice Department, which has been conducting a criminal investigation. The Pentagon first discovered the sensitive documents posted to Discord, Twitter, Telegram, and 4chan last week. Department of Defense press secretary Patrick Ryder described the leak as a “deliberate criminal act.”While Teixeira was relatively inexperienced in the military, he had access to highly classified military intelligence through a Defense Department computer network known as the Joint Worldwide Intelligence Communications System, said a U.S. official familiar with the matter.According to the Washington Post, Teixeira reportedly told the roughly two dozen chat group members that he worked on a military base. In interviews, members of Thug Shaker Central said their group had started out as a place where young men and teenage boys could bond over their love of guns, share memes—sometimes racist ones—and play war-themed video games. Sharing the classified documents was a way Teixeira could both inform and impress. It was meant “to educate people who he thought were his friends and could be trusted” free from the propaganda swirling outside, one member said. But, as is the case with the internet, another member of the server eventually shared the documents on another server, leading to their spread across the web.

Meanwhile:

Georgia Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene defended the suspected leaker, but her comments were at odds with those of fellow Republicans and drew backlash from Democrats.

Tax Day Is Approaching

You’ve still got time, but not much

Next Tuesday—April 18th to be exact—is the last day to file taxes. So, if you haven't done them yet ... well, you know what you've got to do this weekend. But don't worry. You're not alone. The Internal Revenue Service reported that it received 90 million returns as of March 30. In total, the IRS said more than 168 million individual tax returns are expected to be filed this year “with the vast majority of those coming before the tax deadline.”To help you stress a little less, here's a helpful fact: If your return contains no errors or red flags, your refund should be delivered within 21 days if you file electronically and opt to have the money directly deposited in your bank account, the IRS said. What's more, many Americans—the IRS estimates up to 70%—are eligible for a program called IRS Free File. This program provides access to free tax preparation software. (To qualify, you must have had an adjusted gross income of $73k or less in 2022.)Of course, if you're scrambling to finish your return by Tuesday, you should file an extension immediately before it's too late. Unless you're living in portions of six states that suffered natural disasters. (Residents in certain areas of New York have until May 15; in Arkansas, Mississippi and Tennessee, July 31; and in Alabama, California and Georgia, Oct. 16.) 

FYI:

What happens if you don't file your taxes? The penalties can be “huge.”

2023’s TIME 100

Let’s dig into the year’s most influential people

Angela Bassett, Austin Butler, Doja Cat, and TikTok's CEO are on the list. TIME's “100 Most Influential People in the World” list was announced Thursday. Each year, the media outlet honors the individuals that it feels are holding sway. The logrolling list contains everyone from comedians and sports stars to authors, tech titans and other influential figures.What I've always appreciated about the list is how they honor each person with praiseful blurbs from unique contemporaries. For instance, Amy Poehler sings the praises of Aubrey Plaza. British Vogue's Edward Enniful handles the blurb commemorating King Charles.The list was first published in 1999. It's now broken down into categories: From artists and innovators to titans and pioneers. And unlike the Time Person of the Year, which has selected Adolf Hitler, Joseph Stalin, and Nikita Khrushchev among its honorees, the TIME 100 is far less controversial.

Dig Deeper:

Ever wonder how the magazine picks their picks? I'll let them explain.

A New Sriracha Shortage Looms

Everyone's favorite brand with the rooster bottle, is experiencing production issues again

Just when we thought it was safe to enjoy sriracha with abandon once more, manufacturer Huy Fong Foods told CBS MoneyWatch this week that another shortage is looming.Blame a drought in Mexico, where the red jalapeños used for the sauce are sourced. It's made it difficult for the brand to get enough to keep up with demand. And demand is high—the cult-favorite condiment sells more than 10 million bottles every year.According to the Los Angeles Times, the chilies can only grow in the Southwestern United States or Northern Mexico and are typically grown during the first four months of the year. Last year, beyond the drought, the crops also were impacted by two back-to-back La Niña events. “Although some production did resume this past fall season, we continue to have a limited supply that continues to affect our production,” the company said in a statement, per USA Today. “At this time, we have no estimations of when supply will increase.” 

DIY:

Salon writer Mary Williams proves that it's almost too easy to make your own sriracha at home.

In Other News

Abortion pills overseas market

Websites offer a convenient, though legally dubious, route.

Have you heard about ...

Square wheel

A Weekend Pairing

‘Clone High’ + Johnnie Walker Gold

Clone High

Twenty years ago, Phil Lord, Christopher Miller, and Bill Lawrence’s Clone High ended on a cliffhanger that left all of its teenaged clones of famous historical figures flash-frozen by John Stamos on their prom night. Today, HBO Max is thawing out those beloved but not forgotten clones.If you haven’t heard, the streamer is taking 20-year high school reunions to a new level, bringing back the animated show for a second season two decades after MTV canceled it. If you’ve never caught the original, the storyline followed a secret military project that created the clones of famous historical figures—including Abe Lincoln, Cleopatra, Joan of Arc and JFK—and put them in high school. Many of the same characters and voice actors will be returning for the show, including Will Forte, Nicole Sullivan, and co-creator Chris Miller. And don’t worry, it’s not going anywhere this time—the show has already received a pickup for a third season as well.

Pair It With

Johnnie Walker Gold

It’s not as old as the show, but how about sipping on a nicely aged bourbon? As the second child in the Johnnie Walker family, many might look past this 18-year-old release in favor of the brand’s iconic Blue Label bottling. But this blended whisky delivers a greatest hits rendition of all the different Scotch styles. It packs a powerful punch of peat, mellowed with the sweet undertones of caramel and cake batter.

Also Worth a Watch:

The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel’ season 4 on Prime Video, and ‘A Black Lady Sketch Show,’ season 4 on HBO Max

Shopping

What We’re Buying

A Minimal Cardholder

Tanner Goods minimal cardholder

A slim cardholder made of featherweight 3 oz skirting leather. The vegetable-tanned hide will guarantee an excellent patina.

Get It:

Minimal cardholder, $55 / $38.50 by Tanner Goods

Morning Motto

Get out and get living this weekend.

Go where you feel most alive.

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